I swear to god, these limbs are worthless when hearts are at stake. Indescribable as ever, weaved and undetected, almost faultless at first glance. The mind shuts down, refusing to work unless it’s to cover up and fix, making everything perfect as it had been once again. Little pulses ebbing, pressing against my sore temples, willing every budge to move for the better.
Why is this feeling so repulsive? A want, perhaps even a need to help, and yet in doing so, the heart is yet victimized. Torn between wanting to do something good, and resenting the brilliant outcome. How feelings aren’t taken into consideration by the world, I still cannot grasp the full meaning. By wanting to do something admirable and not penchant about what good has become of it is not anything to comprehend, because the feeling itself makes no sense.
Maybe it’s my mind in turmoil, the thoughts chucked and gyrated, nothing staying long enough to even have time to try and think about. Weary, tired of things that seemed to begin with such radiance and the end that still seems so far away, unable to even graze them with my fingertips. My eyes droop, the images in them swirled and danced, playing and fooling my vision into something else, something unimportant, insignificant.
Why can’t I just live it up? Give in, and let my pride sleep on the ground, my guilt buried in the deep sand, my shame swallowed by the sea. Little bubbles of laughter raced up my trachea, the irony of wanting them to happen, and have them taunt me altogether at the same time. It’s just having everything go back to the way it used to, now with feelings attached.
Sighing, every hard ragged breath in, filtering the dirty tainted air in my lungs, trying and trying to keep inhaling evenly. The world I see is a dark mess, a pitch black whirlwind of unforgiving and disloyal creatures, including me. Sometimes I just hate myself so bad just for thinking about letting go. I need to latch in a secret place in my mind, and hope that no one will ever find me.
And maybe no one ever will.
Grh. Updates on the outing. I’m so lazy noww.
Thanks Elle! I know it took you super loads of trouble just to email them to me (:
Best 4J outing ever. See you guys in the morning.
I need my dose of prescribed caffeine to myself.
Sick of feeling sleepy all the time.
Ahh. Sleep, so faar awaaaaaay.
Why is this feeling so repulsive? A want, perhaps even a need to help, and yet in doing so, the heart is yet victimized. Torn between wanting to do something good, and resenting the brilliant outcome. How feelings aren’t taken into consideration by the world, I still cannot grasp the full meaning. By wanting to do something admirable and not penchant about what good has become of it is not anything to comprehend, because the feeling itself makes no sense.
Maybe it’s my mind in turmoil, the thoughts chucked and gyrated, nothing staying long enough to even have time to try and think about. Weary, tired of things that seemed to begin with such radiance and the end that still seems so far away, unable to even graze them with my fingertips. My eyes droop, the images in them swirled and danced, playing and fooling my vision into something else, something unimportant, insignificant.
Why can’t I just live it up? Give in, and let my pride sleep on the ground, my guilt buried in the deep sand, my shame swallowed by the sea. Little bubbles of laughter raced up my trachea, the irony of wanting them to happen, and have them taunt me altogether at the same time. It’s just having everything go back to the way it used to, now with feelings attached.
Sighing, every hard ragged breath in, filtering the dirty tainted air in my lungs, trying and trying to keep inhaling evenly. The world I see is a dark mess, a pitch black whirlwind of unforgiving and disloyal creatures, including me. Sometimes I just hate myself so bad just for thinking about letting go. I need to latch in a secret place in my mind, and hope that no one will ever find me.
And maybe no one ever will.
Grh. Updates on the outing. I’m so lazy noww.
Thanks Elle! I know it took you super loads of trouble just to email them to me (:
Best 4J outing ever. See you guys in the morning.
I need my dose of prescribed caffeine to myself.
Sick of feeling sleepy all the time.
Ahh. Sleep, so faar awaaaaaay.
Sleepover/Pre OU/ OU
Yu Hui and Elle slept over on Saturday.
Gah, morning blues.
Gimme some credit, I was up till 2am (:
The huge problem with opening your eyes in the morning.
Dance Practise.
Btw, this is not in order.
Lazy laah (:
Kiss Me :O
Let me hit you up. Subtley ( :
I need to stop having cute pictures of this boy :D
*Pmsingly. SHH NASRI SHAUN'S ON THE PHONE!
We'll throw you off your feet.
STARBUCKS !Just got to ou.
Waiting for Nasri.
WHO DOESNT UNDERSTAND THE TIME 11AM.
Yu Hui and Me Moment.
Bimbo moment. Mind me.SNOOKER TIME!
SO CUTEEE :D AHHHH.
God, how vulgar :D.Hahaha, kidding.
Love you Ellee.
Extras.
GROUPS
Extras.
GROUPS
We had a great day, mostly drinking and eating.
But that's besides the point (:
We've finally got started on the songs.
And we finished the first minute of the dance.
YAY! *Claps hands*
And I got my nerdy specs, which are AWESOME by the way (:
The Nerds
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