Monday, August 31, 2009

298. And it's still so hard to be who you are.

ON THE WAY TO KUALA TERENGGANU! (:







_______________________________________________

THE BEACHY BEACH ! (:








THE NIGHT OUT AT THE BAR AND POOL! (:












THE PRE/POST BANANA BOAT RIDE! (:


All in all it was great fun. No tan lines, no sunburns, no scrapped knees in the sand, no carpet burns, no headaches, no dry skin.

GOODBYE HOLIDAYS HELLO HOMEWORK AND SHITBALLS.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

297. Look and see the sky turn red, like blood it covers over me.


I seldom have anymore dreams. I have nightmares, waking up to nothing but the beat of my heart drumming in my ears, the cold sweat that dampens my pillow, the bitter unsettling feeling that chills me to the bone. I wake up knowing that I know nothing. I don't remember what I've dreamt about, I don't remember falling into a dark abyss, I don't remember being eaten alive, I don't remember drowning in mud, or watching myself wrench my bloodied heart from my chest, or recalling anything that would make me feel this way.



I just wake up, knowing that when sleep comes, the same nightmares will run back into my mind, and replay over and over, seemingly endless till the crack of light sifts through my blinds, till sunlight touches my lids and kiss them awake. I feel like I haven't slept in days, like the crushing weight of my eyelids would send me into another nightmare. I wake up, and it's like I'm more tired then ever. I can't sleep, I don't want to. Sleep doesn't come like it used to, like slow calling winds that wrap themselves around me. Now it's like I'm trapped in a tornardo that I can't seem to escape.



And I don't want to admit it, and I can't admit it to anyone, but.


It's all about you. Everything in my nightmare is about you, but I don't know what it is I dream about. You instill fear into me, rush into my lungs like a blades, slice me up into little insignificant pieces. I'm confured, you make me confused, swirling in my thoughts. I wish I had that kind of courage, that ruthless manor with no care in the world. But I can't let myself break, can't let myself fall into pieces, can't let myself go again. I'm not like that anymore.



I'm scared, everytime I think of telling you.



I'm scared of what you'd say, how you'd respond. I don't know if you'd hold me, or push me away. I don't know if you'd feel the same way, or tear this fragile thin line of friendship into pieces. Fear is such a tragic, sadistic thing.

Sometimes I do think the chance is too long gone, that I've already done it, fucked the entire thing up without even knowing.



I want you to know that you live in my head, and fly and linger on my every passing thought. I want you to know that I do imagine us holding hands under the covers, or sing until we're both breathless. I want you to know that your ego is the size of my butt, and that you are annoying as hell. I want you to know that I think of you a lot, and I miss the times where everything was beautiful and nothing hurt.



But you don't know anything.





And I think it's best we keep it that way, because.




You mean more to me than the world would ever know.

296. You, had me worried :D


GET WELL SOON FATS.
I LOVE YOU.
(:

Saturday, August 29, 2009

295. I'm all for you.

You know what?
I actually kinda miss you.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

294. When there is nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire.

Save me. But the words don't come out. Struggling to breath. Every second, a waste. A nauseating, worthless tick of time. And is that she, the beautiful one to come and save him? No, it isn't. He was a betrayer. A Betrayer of Love, a Betrayer of Respect. He betrayed her and now he will have to bid her every will. Does she save him? Draw away his water filled lungs? Give him more breath? Give him Life? No, she slips into the murky water, and shoves his head down along with hers, tangle his breath in her hair, gripped his arms so had till blood had begun to show. His face, his perfectly symmetrical face that often seemed carved of stone, turned from red, to white, to blue. As bubbles rose to kiss the nights cool glow, 2 dead bodies drown, beaneath the wide open sea. One of love, and the other of betrayal.

293.

ABDC WEEK 3

Nicooole : Poyo (Noseri)


HOMAGOD HOMAGOD.
I KNOW WHO GOT KICKED.
THANK GOD
THANK GOD.
THANK GOD
SHHHHHHHIT NICOLLE U PRACTICALLY GAVE IT AWAY=.=
No, it's not beat ya feet kings
=.=

its southern movement isn't it



( :
BITCH , POTONG WEI
YOU ASKED RIGHT!

:D

Monday, August 24, 2009

292. Never stop gushing.

OH. MY. GOD.
IS SHE REALLY WEARING THAT.
GIRL, SHE IS SO LAST 15 MINUTES.
Chace and BLEAH. :D