Friday, April 24, 2009
193. From an old sweetheart of mine.
And muses on the faes of friends he has known,
So I turn the leaves of Fancy, till, an a shadowy design,
I find that smiling features of an old sweetheart of mine.
The lamplight seems to glimmer with a flicker of surprise,
As I turn it low - to rest me of the dazzle in my eyes.
And light my pipe in silence, save a sigh that seems to yoke
Its fate with my tobacco and to vanish with the smoke.
'Tis fragrant retrospection,- for the loving thoughts that start
Into being are like perfume from the blossom of my heart.
And to dream the ol' dreams over is a luxury of dive-
When my truant fancies wander with that old sweetheart of mine.
Though I hear beneath my study, like a fluttering of wings,
The voices of my children and the mother as she sings-
I feel no twingeof conscience to deny my any theme
When Care has cast her anchor in the harbour of a dream-
In fact, the speak with earnest, I believe it adds a charm
To spice the good trifle with a little dust of harm,-
for I find an extra flavour in Memory's mellow wine
That makes me drink deeper to that old sweetheart of mine.
A face of lily beauty, with a form of airy grace,
Floats out of my tobacco as the Genii from the vase;
And I thrill beneath the glances o a pair of azure eyes
As glowing as the summer and as tender as the skies.
I can see the pink sunbonnet and the little checkered dress
She wore when I first kissed her and she answered the caress
With the written declaration that, "as surely as the vine
Grew 'round the stump," she loved me-that old sweetheart of mine.
And again I feel the pressure of her slender little hand,
As we used to talk together of the future we had planned,-
When I should be a poet, and with nothing else to do
But write the tender verses tat she set the music to...
Then we should live together in a cozy little cot
Hid in a nest of roses, with a fairy garden spot,
Where the vines were ever fruited, and the weather ever fine,
And the birds were ever singing for that old sweetheart of mine.
When I should be her lover forever and a day,
And she my faithful sweetheart till her golden hair was gray;
And we should be so happy when either's lips were dumb
They would not smile in Heaven till the other's kiss had come.
But, ah! my dream is broken by a step upon the stair,
And the door is softly opened, and-my wife is standing there;
Yet eagerness and rapture all my vision I resign,-
To greet the living prescence of that old sweetheart of mine.
(:
192 Kuchirat.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
190. I'd hold you for a million years, to make you feel my love.
I can feel my brain juices popping and oozing out from every pore on my skin. My head is just about bursting with the aftermath of my screams of sheer, pure, delight. I can swallow 5000 bowls of sambals, and maybe 2 mexican chillies, but whatever.
Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in. Matt got in, Matt got in.
Hopefully, VFTW will vote Matt in and kick Allison out.
I'm against everyone who's against Matt.
Now, I can die in peace
(:
Did I say die?
I meant now I can dine in peace.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
189. Found a way to reach my heart, take it all back to the start.
Monday, April 20, 2009
188. FRED.
Elle' says:
gah
fine =.=
oh yeah
hahaa
just now wei shen called
and he was like
can I speak to sheng yang?
and I was like
what?
and he was like
can I speak to sheng yang?
huh?
then
he was like
huh?
and I was like what?
and then he was like hmm
then I was like
are you wei shen..
then he was like yes?
then I was like
I am elle.
and he was like
Oh, HAHAHHAA
=.=
Ladidumm.
PS: Forget about my title. Just HEEEEE in the moment kinda thing.
PPS: Fred is GAY.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
187. Babe, I'm no princess in a shining dress, we'll make a pretty one out of this mess.
I just soaked myself dry in my mum's bath tub, and truly considered drowning in it. Then I remembered there was still left over chocolate cake in my fridge, so I came up for some air.
Advice?
Some things are so worth living for.
Another one?
Better drown yourself if you wanna stay thin.
186. Lover be strong, while I'm gone. And if you feel like falling, just hold on.
I don't really know who I am anymore. My mood swings are terrible, and I'm a different person every three hours. I rebel and do things I know I shouldn't do. I play around too much, and I'm so sick of trying to search for the true me when there are so many other things I could be.
I smile the same, and never look people in the eye when I speak. I notice too many things, but I never judge people on their first impressions. I feel inferior to myself, and know that I'm not what I think I am. Then who am I? And who am I supposed to be?
I'm just lost and confused, and right at this utterly broken moment, wallowing in my self-pity. I don't laugh as much as I do, I don't know what the hell I'm doing pushing myself to do things I know I can never be.
Lost, completely.
Friday, April 17, 2009
185.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Monday, April 13, 2009
Sunday, April 12, 2009
181. Sometimes, I think I should've been born a blonde.
Whoopie.
I can just imaginee...
David:
Oh cool! Awesome! That's for me?
Like duh, no shit right :D
Okay, like it's super real now :D
Ean : Don't push, don't push!
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
180. Smooth and silent as a whisper.
Baby, is my blood boiling on your tongue? Don't be shy, and hide by drinking away from your empty cup. Though your skin may glisten with the sun, you are no more mundane than the cuts on my skin, or the burning longed breath in my throat. Poison etches on your splotched and scarred skin, and paints my lips with the colour of bruises. Cantankerous, an anger swells and bursts into flames in your head. My, my, not only cold, but dark, and dead.
179. Twists and turns, endless flights in this romance.
Though I care greatly of what you feel, and even if you act like there wasn’t a thing in the world that could bother you, it causes you a immense deal of hurt. You don’t show, no, you hardly show anything. Feelings are such a safeguarded secret with you. Do I stay strong for you by helping you let it all out, or do I close up the situation as if it were another chapter of an unfinished book?
Mixed emotions, a whole torrent of sensation gushing through my bloodstreams, making it so hard to think. I don’t know what I can do; I don’t know who to talk to, or how to tell anyone what I mask. It’s the hard outer core, and again with that weird feeling that I know what I’m doing, what I’m feeling, is wrong, and yet I can’t even begin to think about stopping this rush simmering in my chest.
Do I like the feeling of being thrown into the throes and throngs of something out of the ordinary, or can I really say that I know this feeling, this indescribable moment that takes me back to when I was wild and young beyond all means? Is this because I’m in a rush to grow up, or because I know that I am not worth all the trouble, that makes me sink deeper and deeper into this inescapable hole?
I’m crashing hard, I swear. And who knows if when I reach rock bottom, there were only those who clung on to me throughout left to pick up the pieces. I want to hold onto something steadfast, that unwavering, unfaltering ease to pick up the phone and never stop talking till all the lines are dead, an untiring, indefatigable feeling to do it all over again by all means.
Thoughts weld up more and more, and I don’t think there’s enough space left in this head of mine to contain everything. I can feel them pressing up against my temples, rushing to be thought about all at once, and none at all. Inexorable? Never. I'm always tired, relentlessly ramming myself against a wall of concrete for at least something to keep the boredom away, to keep myself from thinking, from picking up and pressing the keys with my thumbs till they are numb.
I don't tell anyone, and nobody bothers to tell me why.
I’m crashing, unhurried and dawdling, because I'm not sure why I’m crashing for you.
178. What the freaaaak.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
177. We're the hushed sounds of doom and gloom.
Remarkable, and often misjudged.
Though, the power greatly remains in your coarse fingers.
You are admired, and seen to be much more than given credit for.
Don’t allow the moon to wash away your tears,
The tracks upon your sullen face.
We are a moving force, the drive for your destiny.
Seek well, and exist for a reason.
To be who you are, and never to be lost finding out.
(:
Babe, you know that I'm all that and then some more for you.
Shut up, and fucking listen for once will you? :D
I'll be Loving you long long time.
Saturday, April 4, 2009
176. You keep on building the lie, that you make up for all that you lack.
So, I like, stole the ukulele from Nas, and followed as he suggested. I think. *flips hair*
I did sing something (which is something I don't do quite often), but I didnt post it on YouTube.
Like duh, seriousFly. (NAS :D)
I don't think I'm ready yet, and I don't have the emotional power to block out all the sweet madness. This, hopefully, would be suffice for the moment. Right, Nasri ?
(:
But I will try!
Anyway, moving on.
Thanks you guys, for the best dance crew in the whole entire world. Much of my never ending love! You're each tablespoon of sugar to my little cup of coffee, like the starlight for my moonless city, like the ceaseless, timeless, eternal moment of my entire day.
My eyelids are folding themselves over my vision. I can see the heavy shadows shielding half my eyes. Sometimes, I'm just waiting for the world to crash down on me, like a goddess beckoning to her god, for forgiveness, and for new beginnings.
I'mma go to bed, and pray that the next day would shine brighter than the sun.
(PS: Great birthday, Krystal and Chloe. And it was nice catching up with Arya again.)
.___.
I see Elle (:
This just made my day.
<-----3 Nicole.